Food for thought...

I don't want the perfect person, I don't even aspire to be perfect.... I just want to wake up next to someone who makes me laugh for the rest of my life....

Escape...

This mini vacation was much needed.... Got to kick it with some folks I haven't seen in a while... Got to meet some ppl that were pretty cool.... Also learned why you do not wear flip flops on bourbon st.... Definitely gross... LOL...I did learn something about myself.... I was alot more into that guy than I initially believed... So I am still a little hurt that it didn't work out... :( even if he was not my type his personality made up for it... So all in all my little escape didn't serve it's ultimate purpose... To help me forget but it did serve a purpose... I had a blast... And after a 5 hour drive to think about him and why it's not working.... I'm not sure how i'll feel.... At least I know I tried....anyways here's a couple pics...

genius

planning an escape.. a getaway... i need to drive for hours with nothing but my music and sunglasses... and my destination needs to include someone who loves me unconditionally. it's already in the works... leaving friday... after a date.. this guy was kind of bold in his approach, i can totally appreciate that... highly educated and cultured... i feel bad cause I'm not completely over the last guy... but i can't lose the momentum... gotta keep pushing... more so as a diversion to my pain then as a real viable relationship... I'm so ready to hop on i10 and end up with someone who adores me. yes, he's just a friend. but he's the best kind of friend. the kind that brushes away your tears and gets you drunk enough to forget about "whats-his-name" and the bullshit he pulled... this is the kind of friend who you can share a bed with and not feel like something stupid will happen.. the kind you can wake up next to and talk until your ready to go get breakfast... a real friend... it's so selfish of me to think he will always be this way... and that he'll never want more. but as I see it, I'm giving him everything I have to offer right now... because clearly I am not ready for a relationship... this last dude kinda stung... because he wasn't close to my type.. I wasn't even really attracted to him until I got to know his personality... it was.... different... I don't know if he'll ever realize that I truly liked who he was, not what he was... I wasn't even okay with being seen with him... not because I was embarassed but because I wanted to be sure he was for real... I guess he wasn't.... it happens... I never wish anyone that hurt me bad wishes, I only hope that the lesson I learned from them sticks, and that karma does what it needs to, to justify my anger-grief-sadness.
In other news. I was completely taken back by a recent bit of information. a friend of my brothers told me back in the day he kinda might have had a slight crush on me. this made me so mad! not because of him, I think he's great, but I always felt like I was totally approachable until he told me that. I didn't want to believe it, i mean this is a guy I absolutely think is completely awesome, back then and now.... now I'm stuck with the whole well that would have been good to know... I mean he told me which makes me wonder why? I never really revealed old crushes, most likely because I tell them at the time... fearless even! lol. I just never want to look back and be like "I wish I would have...." because that would drive me crazy... but he was/is a nice guy... and I'm always looking for cool guy friends.... I'm pretty sure at the rate I'm going I'm gonna be "one of the guys" for a long time ughh... it's like 11 and I'm watching hardwood classics, boston v. la, game 4.... it's pretty bad ass... I couldn't even imagine being the type of girl watching *insert some super messy reality show here* even in class these chicks were discussing some show about women in basketball.. and I was clueless... one of the guys next me asked if I watched it.. I laughed, and said that's not on espn.... his reaction was priceless.... this game is amazing larry, kareem, magic... what kind of magical line up?? and the booty shorts...LMBO... okay that's it....

oh I aced my a&p test. (thus the title) go me!